New Years

Happy new years Television
I love the way I turn you on
Tonight I'll raise a glass
And offer anothers years worth of Scotch soaked promises
To you

Just listen, like you allways do
And let's stay in tonight and watch the world
And count the revolutions per minute

Untitled

This is how you like to see me
The boy with paper thin cheeks
Awaiting a kiss from your broken glass lips

You like to see me covered in debris
Choking on dust
Choking on my breath

I don't like the taste of blood
So why can't I stop biting my tongue?
I love seeing things through your eyes

(Words) You fail me

the trees

I see the betrayal in his eyes
hear the quavering sincerity in his voice
his hand reaches for my arm
I hold back unintentionally
as the sound of a tree falling fills my throat
but he does not hear it
the many trees which have been felled in his honor
he has been deaf to them all
maybe it is I
I who have been deaf
surrounded by my trees for too long
their own sounds muffling everything else
my breathe-the wind
my tears-the rain
my laughter-the rustling of leaves
each cacophony of sounds rising up and muting everything else
it is my own forest
complete
in it I can breathe, but can anyone else.
and so I turn to him
prepared to invite him in, showing him the path
but every time I try my personal cacophony fills my senses
until I forget even my own words
and I retreat back
I climb into the trees
higher and higher until I am dizzy
all so I can see the path which is there to take
but I don't leave
not even to save myself from the trees.

Sand

Your eyes
like the bottomless cups of coffee I drink
getting through the days without you
and every touch you give
only leaves me feeling like Iccuris
your fingerprint burned onto my skin
everything I see your back, your neck streched out
your walk
like an ibis.

I feel like I am stranded
on an island
in the sea of you
and every word you threw at me
rolls back to me
washing me
taking a little every time it rolls back
my island receding.

barren and alone
only waiting for the seed to be dropped
from you
my ibis
my bringer of life
I wait
as I slowly disappear
dispersed so casually into you
its all I can do.
and it is all I want.

Broken
but darkly beautiful pieces of
our two year past
torn
in one pathetic moment.

One
minute so close in stomach
earthquake causing warm embrace
but
in the next completely extinct.

The
attraction and comfort and companionship
built on secrets shared with no one else
gone
with just a few words of farewell.

Those
words just slipped from my lips
with much uncertainty and hesitation
yet
they still breathily wandered out.

And
with that my dreams of rejection
yet again haunt my sleep so that I wake with
dark
circles under my eyes and lonely fatigue.

Each
night I want to again fall asleep to your
soothing voice telling me sweet nothings but I
let
it go and it is now a whisper across my memory.

My
friends adamantly believe my farewell was
more than right but never do I express my
true
feelings of wanting our hearts to be chained.

But I had to let go
for love does not as they often say
consist in gazing at one another
but in looking outward

together

in the same direction.

The Love I Found

When the eyes met
It was fire and sparks
Now I am a junkie
And you are my track marks

Lycanthrope

This blood pumping through my veins
This is the blood of a predator

This blood that stains my jowls
This is the blood of children
This is the blood of the nameless, the forgotten

This concrete jungle I prowl
This kingdom of concrete and steel
Compels me to hunt

Eat
Fuck
Kill

In the light of the billboard
I shift

She isn't an exhaustion
But a catalyst for the hours.
A temporary companion
Pieced by stiff shoulders,

By breasts.
Hands.
And hip bones.

Specific about wanting more
She attempts to seduce.
He's fixated with a door
"Is it a ruse?" "Nothing but a ruse."

Poetic?
Sounding pathetic?
Sounding, if at all?

The girl is young
Insecure, and by tenfold increased
As she falls for this Ming
Lover and trysts.

Twelve years more of feeling the sun's rays.
Twelve years more of music, books and films.
Twelve years more of wandering hands.

What's twelve years more?
A lifetime to him,
An insecurity to her.
And the fixation on the door.

Junior

You're a little puppet who dangles on a string
With no idea of the consequence you bring
You wobble through a land a thousand years old
Your shiny new paint conspicous and bold
Lookin' for gold

Dictatin' the lives of a billion and one
You're holdin' the world under the barrel of a gun
Liberate your weapon and fight me if you choose
I don't care how many fingers you lose
I got one for you

You shoot rounds into enemy chests
While I shoot sounds into innocent heads
So no one gets scared when I come around
I never say duck but they always get down
Down to my sound

How did you get to where you are today
Sayin all the things you don't know how to say
Someone up there is lookin out for you
Or is it someone down here who knows what to do
Speakin through you

You do what you do because you do what you're told
By a vision of god from the testament of old
But if he saw the chair that you're well known to use
He'd fry you in it whatever your excuse
Good luck in them shoes

I'd buy you up if I only had the money
Make you soak your little balls in honey
And send out the bees to bring you to your knees
And laugh in your face as you're beggin to me
You're a disease

So here I am taking pots shots at you
Shootin from the lip not a b52
You can pull off my strings and fill me full of lead
But you can never change the things that i've said
Lurkin' in your head
Sweatin' in your bed
Forever till you're dead

Into my opposite’s eyes.
Full of thought, holding back haste.
Can u feel my soul-
Am I just reflecting what I can’t express in your face?

I’d like to see answers but the confusion is defracted
Like the lasers through the serotonin crowd.
Clear at first, fuzzy come dawn, decompacted.

I am failing all the past lessons
History repeats.
Another love match defeat?
Repetition will catch me as I go into the void
I can no longer avoid the devoid and I need to know
If anything or anyone will understand the solitude
The amplitude
Is it even so?
Am I the same? Will I ever know?

Where does my circle start or am I getting cornered
By overcomplicating what should be treated as "fragile-
serrated borders".
With my emotions I can not be shrewd
As I am out of control and I have no restraint
Some say this is a gift, but Lithium.
The numbed speak no complaint.

My deluded mind; hold back my insanities.
But I am rambling now which is where the problem started
File my erratic thoughts as memories
From the fear be parted.

By Monkey